[Intro] Hello, I've read your bulletin and I just wanted to say That this is what I needed to hear but you knew that anyways You wouldn't ask how I identify, you just gave options to me I'm three different ways, possibly, you can share your personality with me [Verse 1] I admit I couldn't stop until I forgot how to start I met my match, someone...Learn More

How many people could say they smoked with Willy Nelson? A fuck load, but so can Dick Steel How many people could name a whole bunch of Pokémon? A shit load, but so can Dick Steel He probably sleeps with a stuffed Snorlax Upon his bed He usually has that knitted cap On top of his head How many people could say they pissed off Lou...Learn More

I'm sorry that I wasn't there I'm sober here, I'm sober now And the trust falls only once a year We're falling sometimes down It would help if you've been there before You'd know that we need helping more Accepting that I'm fallible, and we're falling sometimes down Falling sometimes down Sometimes promises can get away from you Sometimes awful...Learn More

I hate this song, I hate this song The chords are fuckin' stupid, they're predictable as shit I want this song to be over fuckin' lickety-split, cause I hate this song, I hate this song I hated this song before it was cool to openly hate this song Yeah, I'm a hipster about my own shit so everybody sing along Come on! I hate this song, I hate this...Learn More

[Intro] Half liked by the folks who know me Half known by the folks who like me [Bridge 1] Half drawn into corners Corners that we've drawn [Chorus] I've got to rip this blanket from my mouth You can't tell, or the secrets will get out We protect the ones who hurt us most of all They know... [Verse 1] Have you ever been certain that you couldn't...Learn More

[Intro] All our celebrities keep dying While the cruel men continue to win You reassure me in a way you only can Get these days to go by like the swaying of a ship [Verse 1] Your shape in the dark Out of state, licensed to me Public pool, Miller moon Don't turn away, I'm still awake [Bridge] Steering on hostile waves of panic Like fighting a...Learn More

My girl's like a pin-up girl That you'd see in magazines Not like in Penthouse, or Playboy, or Hustler More like the ones from the fifties If you ever saw her change Well, you'd probably think so too But you'll never watch her change Cause she belongs to me, not you My girl just made popcorn And a glass of water, too She's watching me write the...Learn More

If somebody tells you that you're a dick You might be a dick so be prepared That some people just aren't gonna like you If somebody tells you that your words hurt They might be hurt so be prepared for the chance that you're a dick Or that they just want attention And, how did it get this way? We're getting closer every day To the thing that we've...Learn More

There's a guy that don't get Clutch But we still remain friends Well, not so much friends, it's really one-sided He still buys my records Or, he doesn't so much buy my records But engages in piracy When he could just go to my website And download them from me But, why don't he get Clutch? Is Neil Fallon just too much? Doesn't he like rock and...Learn More

I've been so good this year, and I only asked for one thing! All I want for Christmas is a blowjob I don't even care who it's from And if I got my holiday blowjob All ye faithful would come Whether I'm naughty or I'm nice - well, that's a case of truly blurred lines I crave this specific act, spread some holiday cheer to my sack! All I want for...Learn More

I wanna make you better But I don't know how And if I did I probably wouldn't know you now I'd be famous for the heathen powers I possess And I would've been busy saving the world You probably know the rest - right? Or maybe you don't Because then you'd be psychic And our lives would be Incredibly different You'd have seen me coming But you'd...Learn More

You don't understand the business end, I can’t tell you what the product is We provide goods and services for a nominal fee We're listed in the first volume of the white part of the phone book Don't call if you have to ask, we don’t have time for questions Just stop me if you've heard this one about how the west was really won Your satisfaction's...Learn More