Well I've got a thing for your lip ring I'd like to get impaled on your painted nails Don't try to tell us anything We'll have some fun and see where it lands (Chorus) Yeah we all start somewhere, and I think you know I'm right We all start somewhere and I feel like starting tonight I've got a thing for your lip ring And I've been entranced by...Learn More

Nervous and excited with all these thoughts running through your head Lying awake in bed Ever since a teen wondering when you'd finally catch a smell But what if you go to hell? So speak up and have your say Yes you've got the pressures of being straight For years just wondering what it's like on the other end But you're worried she won't...Learn More

Hey office lady. I see you there with your rolodex You know what I'm going to do for you? I'm going to change out this water jug one-handed But first Imma spill a few drops into your lap And dab them up with this powerful organ in my mouth And by that I mean my tongue Because I'm a man And I can tell by my reflection in this duck painting that I look...Learn More

Yeah you've been waiting to hear from me All original material called it like I see I'll admit that most of you's alright But when I saw those knobs it ruined the rest of my night It's your knees Yeah it's your knees that's it Oh it's your knees It's your knees no way Oh they don't do it for me My opinions are written as law Tallying up all the...Learn More

Lock yourself in a cage Tie both arms behind your back Deprive yourself of any food Engage in blackmail, using private personal information Put out a cigarette on your arm Withdraw your savings and waste them Sell your soul to yourself Wear a foolish outfit of your own choosing And have a big laugh at your own expense Draw an ice cold bath and...Learn More

You've been gone all day So here I wait In the dark and in the cold this is where I stay I know I'm ignored Too often I'm so bored But once a day is enough to feel adored Now you're moving in Almost time to work out Find me in the back and pull me out Yeah I know you're stressed I've been there too Forget the rest of the world, it's me and...Learn More

If I climbed up a flagpole I'd still find children crying there There was a time when that would bother me but now I couldn't care You're living down in Houston, but for me that's just too hot One day we'll meet in New Orleans, and we can sweat a lot You're vomiting next to me, while I finish my ice cream I'm handed a love letter but I'm not sure...Learn More

Doesn't matter what my age I've always run a pleasure race Walking, running, driving home It's all the same, my thoughts don't change Make my plans around the race Priorities have to be made Got no time for other things so leave a message, I'm afraid Chorus I won't let anything in my way When I finish sometimes it's really great Always on time...Learn More

Have you ever been furniture have you ever been somebody's seat Have you ever sat there catching crumbs while they eat Well? Have you ever been furniture have you ever been somebody's chair Knees grinding down, back goes numb And they don't even seem to care Huh? Have ya? Do you know what it's like? Humanity ignored, and ridden like a bike Well?...Learn More

You wanna learn about me and dig inside my head? You think I'm defined by a mystical book you read? Read a bunch of nonsense Treat it like it's real You ask me for my sign You try to guess my sign But you'll never understand Why I feel what I feel Wanna rub me with a crystal and heal me with a gem? You think I'm one of you, but really I'm one of...Learn More

Some guys were born for the night When desperation's a losing fight They go out, out on the town Walks alone, down through Old City Runs on booze and a lot of pity I think I've probably seen it all But this guy really knows how to crawl No one's gonna give him a look So he hits the deck like a crook and goes Down, down on the ground Human...Learn More

I went to an R-rated movie because I was bored just the other day Fell in love with all the celebrities, I wanted to hear what they had to say I got nervous watching the sex scene, but they never quite made it all the way I lost count of all the blown-up buildings, much more exciting than the rest of my day (Chorus) See I love that action Throw in...Learn More