When your calls go uncollected And your neighbours have electrified the fence When will you start thinking, will it sink in, will you exercise some sense Everybody hates you, thinks it's great you've got the flu Do you know why? I'ts because your such a shite they'll laugh all night With sheer delight the day you die Your hand inside your habit,...Learn More

There's solace in drink and a drink in your hand All the culture you can eat, all the yoghurt you can understand Our dancing around each other has grown too intricate Let's get drunk, uncoordinated and inarticulate You're not the young lady I want tonight Let's get drunk and fight There is a tax on ignorance It runs at twelve percent You...Learn More

Some drugs make you funky, some drugs make you twitch Some drugs take your money and some drugs make you rich Some drugs raise revenue, some drugs don't Some drugs will do anything, some drugs won't Some drugs make you better, some drugs make you worse Some drugs lead to half completed dream-induced romantic verse Some drugs give you pain, some...Learn More

All you ever wanted was to write a song as perfect as "Take the Skinheads Bowling" but of course you never did Ah you would have settled for a lifetime in that lover who swapped you for Another and much inferior kid You lost most of your money and your tan and your muscles On your last trip to Brussels with your Italian pet And you didn't get laid...Learn More

Here inside the city walls Of galway, I am taking calls The hallway's full of other men Who want to sign me and my friends I used to worry much too much About the price of butterscotch Now I find that I can slouch Into anybody's mouth The men who judge these competitions Ring to offer us positions Blindfolded and on our backs With a choice of...Learn More

The nights I should have stayed at home I didn't stay at home The past that you forgive Days I spent the rent Still had to pay the rent Oh baby, dont tell me we dont live I look like a nightclub in daylight tonight But I feel like a million of something bright Do you get deja-vu with that dela-vu? Well, maybe you don't, but I do Oh baby, don't...Learn More

Very broad of shoulder, slightly less of mind Here is the boy she left behind His the behind she left before she met me... honestly And he says "hey" and I say "what?" And he says, "What cha got that I ain't got?" And I say "pardon?" and he says "Hey! What's she see in you anyway?" And I say "Well I'm sexy as hell I'm an excellent lover and...Learn More

She looked at you, walked past and asked the next stranger directions Contrary to your belief girls dont want just erections You make girls unhappy You've got all the girls money can buy It's fewer than you expected, why? 'cause you make girls unhappy Stockbrokers want to break your stocks Oxfam will not feed your ox Aunties knee you in the...Learn More

Their mother had children and thinking she should She attempted to love them, but my God who could? Kill your children, Mrs. Brown Do your bit for Tidy Town Remove your whitetrash from the gutter Melt your sons for soap and butter And every time I take a bath, I'll think of Mallachy and laugh And I'll recall each punch and boast, as I spread...Learn More

Now that art is a game designed to bring Wealth and fame to wealthy and famous investors How sad if perhaps it should collapse On the startled heads of these poor bastards Midday sunflowers, starry night Cue taxfree corporate delight Buy now, last few remaining In Gainsborough, everybody's gaining Abandon the galleries But should there be no...Learn More

Watching late night television Half in love with Vivien Leigh But she's so beastly dead now Isn't she And the light that glanced off her's Enhanced in my direction By machines that kept her ghost alive To give me this erection And outside drunken twelve-year olds Stand laughing at the fire alarms But oh that she were young again And held me in her...Learn More

Reckless, wild, uncivilised Their mothers hate the way they dress Their fathers going crazy now Faces painted, hair's a mess Thigh-high boots and sky-high hair Flick knives in their underwear, yes But everyboy loves them, man They couldn't care less Celebrate the tarty girls Celebrate the wasted years When you're with the tarty girls The whole...Learn More