[Lyric] 06.01.18 E (The Real Hatred)

Five days after New Year's Day, 2018, I stood at a bridge, watching the trains go by
Shivering
Drunk, I wept, and the lights sparkled in my tear filled eyes
It wasn't a cry for help
I'd tried the 'help' I had been offered
No
This was a decisive action
And at the same time, not
For here I stand, before you
Alive
Fueled by a hatred for life, and above all, myself

Drunk, and sick
On the bridge
I weep
My eyes
Are glued
To the tracks
And the trains
And death
Fills my heart
And my mind
And I shake
On the edge
Of this precipice
Ready
For
Rushing past with no remorse
I have set myself on course
For a gruesome final stand
To free myself by my own hand

All my life I swallowed pain
Never shall I do again
All this fucking suffering
I am fucking leaving

Death shall be my only friend
Unlike those cunts who left me here
All alone with no help
I'll kill them first and burn in hell

Why should I try and stay alive?
No one would care if I died
My mangled corpse shall portray
All my fucking worldly pain

And when my family weep and cry
Down from hell my voice shall rise
Happiness I'd found at last
Now that I have fucking passed

So to you I tell you this
Life is fucking shit
So do what is right and true
And fucking kill yourself too