Song: Ballad of the Bastards Parody of Ballad of Booth
Viewed: 37 - Published at: a year ago
Artist: Unabashed Book Snobs
Year: 2017Viewed: 37 - Published at: a year ago
Balladeer: Someone tell the story, someone sing the song. Every now and then adaptions...go a little wrong. Every now and then Villain Sues are bound to come along. Doesn't stop the story, HBO is pretty strong. Doesn't change the song...
Jonny Snow is a mundane fella’, has all the charisma of cardboard. No one will ever call him clever. But he can swing a sword.
Why did you do it Jonny? March into a trap. Why let your battle plan that you began, fall apart to crap? Some say it was you were enraged, you couldn’t face the facts. Some say the reason you engaged, is ‘cause you’re penned by hacks.
Jonny lives with a blah and bring, kinda like Kit’s acting ability. Somehow his fans are all adoring. Must be that virility.
How could you do it Jonny? Help us understand. You with a full army, you were to lead, against Ramsay, how could you be, without a mere command?
Your sister made you jealous, Jon. You never had her brain. Is that the reason? Tell us, Jon. Or was it just manpain?
Jon (spoken): Are you seein' what they're sayin' about me? That I'm a convincin' sword fighter—that my time in Pompeii helped my form. What I did was bloody awesome, and I won't have snobby book fans sayin' I did it out of jealousy or in some kind of rabid fit.
Balladeer: They say that death had changed you Jon...
Jon (spoken): Here! IGN called it, "A spectacular war chapter."
Balladeer: You ignored Olly’s plight.
Jon (spoken): Rotten Tomatoes gave it a 98% critic rating.
Balladeer: They say that’s what deranged you Jon.
Jon (spoken): Shut-up!
Balladeer: And that you wouldn’t believe Sansa’s right.
Jon (spoken): I said shut-up! ...I have given my life to one purpose. Do you understand? Pass on the truth; you're the only one that can. Please!
Balladeer: He said “damn you Ramsay, you had your way."
Jon (singing): Tell 'em boy!
Balladeer: "With blood you drew out of black and grey."
Jon: Tell 'em all. Tell 'em til they listen...
Balladeer: He said, "damn you Ramsay, and damn the day, your plot armor was put on display.” He said...
Jon: Call me dumb, smear my name, say I did it for the fame, what I did was give the season some excitement. No one cares it was a trap; what matters is viewers clap. Because someone slew the badass... Which makes me and Sansa badass!”
Balladeer: He said, “damn you Ramsay, you cunning whore! You were handed every Northern Lord....and more...”
Jon: Tell 'em boy! Tell 'em the truth, tell ‘em how it happened... How we all wore the same exact outfit, how we got trapped in an open field. Tell ‘em. Tell ‘em...
How the fightin’ and all that it was, is the best TV offers. How recreatin’ the Battle of Cannae, surely keeps stories fresh. How the blood looked shockingly real, how the tracking shots landed. How the sound came and went, every top dollar spent, how the direction is surely worthy of that ALL TIME TEN POINT ZERO IMDB RATING.... always
Always, always, always. The audience is still what it was...
Damn my smarts, say we’re bought, say by all means I’d be shot. Point out how we never did dig any trenches. Let the plot-holes remain, leave it to fanboys to explain. What we did, plain and plain, was a cinematic feat, let them cry “VAPID WRITING,” it was nothin’ but excitin’. The audience is still what it was...
Balladeer: Jonny Snow is a simple fellow. Tells us how he fell into that snare. Doesn’t matter his brain is filled with jell-o, He’s got that luscious hair.
How could you do it Jonny? Calling it what’s right. You led your infantry and cavalry to slaughter we, watched eagerly, just for a visual fight. Yet what should have earned you jeers and boos, with all the massive graves, instead bought you press reviews, where you got only raves.
Damn you Jonny, you paved the way! For shallow writing to make its stay. Most bad writing can have one day. But Thrones won’t go away...
Listen to the stories, hear it in the songs. Plot necessity writes the rules and...action rights the wrongs. Hurts a while but still the ratings, remain ever-strong. And there’s the blow...stings on and on. DAMN YOU SNOW!
Jonny Snow is a mundane fella’, has all the charisma of cardboard. No one will ever call him clever. But he can swing a sword.
Why did you do it Jonny? March into a trap. Why let your battle plan that you began, fall apart to crap? Some say it was you were enraged, you couldn’t face the facts. Some say the reason you engaged, is ‘cause you’re penned by hacks.
Jonny lives with a blah and bring, kinda like Kit’s acting ability. Somehow his fans are all adoring. Must be that virility.
How could you do it Jonny? Help us understand. You with a full army, you were to lead, against Ramsay, how could you be, without a mere command?
Your sister made you jealous, Jon. You never had her brain. Is that the reason? Tell us, Jon. Or was it just manpain?
Jon (spoken): Are you seein' what they're sayin' about me? That I'm a convincin' sword fighter—that my time in Pompeii helped my form. What I did was bloody awesome, and I won't have snobby book fans sayin' I did it out of jealousy or in some kind of rabid fit.
Balladeer: They say that death had changed you Jon...
Jon (spoken): Here! IGN called it, "A spectacular war chapter."
Balladeer: You ignored Olly’s plight.
Jon (spoken): Rotten Tomatoes gave it a 98% critic rating.
Balladeer: They say that’s what deranged you Jon.
Jon (spoken): Shut-up!
Balladeer: And that you wouldn’t believe Sansa’s right.
Jon (spoken): I said shut-up! ...I have given my life to one purpose. Do you understand? Pass on the truth; you're the only one that can. Please!
Balladeer: He said “damn you Ramsay, you had your way."
Jon (singing): Tell 'em boy!
Balladeer: "With blood you drew out of black and grey."
Jon: Tell 'em all. Tell 'em til they listen...
Balladeer: He said, "damn you Ramsay, and damn the day, your plot armor was put on display.” He said...
Jon: Call me dumb, smear my name, say I did it for the fame, what I did was give the season some excitement. No one cares it was a trap; what matters is viewers clap. Because someone slew the badass... Which makes me and Sansa badass!”
Balladeer: He said, “damn you Ramsay, you cunning whore! You were handed every Northern Lord....and more...”
Jon: Tell 'em boy! Tell 'em the truth, tell ‘em how it happened... How we all wore the same exact outfit, how we got trapped in an open field. Tell ‘em. Tell ‘em...
How the fightin’ and all that it was, is the best TV offers. How recreatin’ the Battle of Cannae, surely keeps stories fresh. How the blood looked shockingly real, how the tracking shots landed. How the sound came and went, every top dollar spent, how the direction is surely worthy of that ALL TIME TEN POINT ZERO IMDB RATING.... always
Always, always, always. The audience is still what it was...
Damn my smarts, say we’re bought, say by all means I’d be shot. Point out how we never did dig any trenches. Let the plot-holes remain, leave it to fanboys to explain. What we did, plain and plain, was a cinematic feat, let them cry “VAPID WRITING,” it was nothin’ but excitin’. The audience is still what it was...
Balladeer: Jonny Snow is a simple fellow. Tells us how he fell into that snare. Doesn’t matter his brain is filled with jell-o, He’s got that luscious hair.
How could you do it Jonny? Calling it what’s right. You led your infantry and cavalry to slaughter we, watched eagerly, just for a visual fight. Yet what should have earned you jeers and boos, with all the massive graves, instead bought you press reviews, where you got only raves.
Damn you Jonny, you paved the way! For shallow writing to make its stay. Most bad writing can have one day. But Thrones won’t go away...
Listen to the stories, hear it in the songs. Plot necessity writes the rules and...action rights the wrongs. Hurts a while but still the ratings, remain ever-strong. And there’s the blow...stings on and on. DAMN YOU SNOW!
( Unabashed Book Snobs )
www.ChordsAZ.com