[Lyric] Black Friday Anthem (The Downstreamers)

I guess the snow this morning clogged up traffic
‘Cuz dad’s not home from work
Although the weatherman on T.V
Said that the snow would melt when it touched the dirt
And sleds with sleigh bells tread through
Damp dirty mudslides like a hearse
I hope that something big is planned this year
If it is, I haven’t heard

This year, I don’t give a hoot
If you got anything for me
I just pray, oh, Baby Jesus
There’s no more underwear underneath the tree this year
I just want a happy, merry Christmas in your eyes
I got you somеthing special and I hope it’s just your size

Thе ice trucks peel through the white stuff like a whitewashed Hallmark scene
Mom-and-pop stores closed down, there’s no elves or reindeer to be seen
They were all outmanoeuvred by a thousand Amazon drones
That blocked the skies, flew through our chimneys like a thousand angry Christmas crows
I guess Saint Nick isn’t coming, all I have is you
I’ve been bad, my gifts are cheap, I can’t sleep
And dad ate my cookies, the cookies for Santa!
This Christmas, I don’t want us to forget what makes this holiday so special
Because in the end, we’re all getting our Christmas bonuses
But it’s not what you spend it on that counts: it’s who you spend it on
So spend it on someone who’s at least a little conventionally attractive
Because otherwise, this whole T.V. show will get cancelled and we’ll all have to go home
And we’ll be out of our jobs, so on that note
Let’s get these booger-faced sound people off the stage and get the real actors on
And now, Kirby...
And Claire…

I hope you have a happy Christmas Eve
I hope you have a happy Christmas also
I hope you have a happy Christmas Eve
I hope you have a happy Christmas also

I hope you have a merry Christmas Eve
I hope you have a merry Christmas also
I hope you have a happy New Year’s Eve
I hope you have a happy New Year’s also
Merry Christmas to you!