[Lyric] Creepy Crawlies (Bing Hitler)

[Intro]
Aye, right. A wis wonderin when yous tubes fae the World Wildlife Fund wid start makin yer charity records. Whit is it yes are tryin tae save nou, caterpillars? Christ, if it’s no pandas, it’s creepy crawlies! Well, if ye think A’m makin a record wi Jacques Cousteau, you are sadly mistaken

[Verse 1]
A hope that when A die
A will come back as something nice
A fish or an antelope
Wid be just fine
A widn’t be a wasp
‘Cause they are girny wee rotters
They’ll sting ye when
Ye’re on the beach
Or at the shops
Or the post office
Or even in yer hoose

[Verse 2]
What A really hate
Is wasps wi their wee stripey bodies
And their horrible wee wiggly woggly earieholes
And their angry faces
And their big sharp teeth
A know they don’t really have sharp teeth
But they wid if they could get them
[Chorus]
What A really really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Bees, wasps and hornets
And that wee guy Paul Daniels
What A really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Like Harvey Proctor
And of course Norman Tebbit

[Verse 3]
A also hate ants (och aye)
Especially if they come from Falkirk
And spiders from Inverness
Can sometimes be a bit rowdy
There’s a way that we can break loose
Just spray the bastards
And chase them aboot yer hoose

[Chorus]
What A really really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Bees, wasps and hornets
And of course Paul Daniels
What A really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Like Harvey Proctor
And Norman Tebbit
[Bridge]
I hate spiders and I hate flies
Couldn’t trust a creature with fifty eyes
Centipedes think they’re just great
But they’re just wee bastards that I really hate
Slugs are bad, they think it’s good
To leave slime around your neighbourhood
Look, there’s a wasp, let’s stamp on it!
Look, there’s a wasp, let’s stamp on it!

I wanna pull their wings off and put them in a jar
Or burn their wee bodies with boiling hot tar
Woke up this morning and put on my clothes
Only to find a hornet had stung my nose

[Verse 1]
A hope that when A die
A will come back as something nice
A fish or an antelope
Wid be just fine
A widn’t be a wasp
‘Cause they are girny wee rotters
They sting ye when
Ye’re on the beach
Or at the shops
Or the post office
Or even in yer hoose
[Chorus]
What A really really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Bees, wasps and hornets
And of course Paul Daniels
What A really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Like Harvey Proctor
And Norman Tebbit
What A really really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Bees, wasps and hornets
And of course Paul Daniels
What A really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Like Harvey Proctor
And Norman Tebbit
What A really really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Bees, wasps and hornets
And of course Paul Daniels
What A really hate
Is creepy crawlies
Like…