[Lyric] DARKEST HOUR (XVI The Gemini)

[Intro]
If I killed my will to live am I a murderer? (am I a murderer?)
I been curving all these females have you heard of her? (have you heard of her?)
I been putting Black Forest under- aye (under what?)
“I had a feeling he was weird” shout-out to-

(laughter)

Hey

[Verse]
It ain’t important (nah)
It’s in the past now
And I do not support it (I don't support it)
It’s like a cast now
And I don’t wanna sport it (don't wanna sport it)
They way it’s stalking me
I just might have to court it (just might)

Aye
It’s cool I’m chillin (yeah!)
I buried all the feelings that I fail to mention (I did!)
I feel like somethings yeah, I feel like somethings missing (what is it?)
But I don’t care enough enough to pay attention (oh.)

But are you wishing? (huh?)
To see me happy again? no? Then who you kidding (who you kidding?)

The only time I’m happy now is in the kitchen
(yeah, yeah, the only time I’m happy now is in the kitchen)

I see you schemin (huh?)
But in the future I’ll be stuck with all my demons
(but in the future I’ll be stuck with all my demons)

Aye
Yuh
Listen:

I keep on cramming
Emotions right now
I’m damning
Myself for all my past sins
It’s a battle I cannot win
Are we family- hey are we friends
Not right now- I messed up again
I keep asking is this the end
I keep asking is this the end
Said you’d forgiven me (huh?)
But I swear it felt like I was still the enemy (I'm still the enemy)
I’ve known it my whole life
I recognize the energy (yeah)
So all this hate towards me
Is nothing new to me (not really)

Aye

I’m way too lost and empty (huh)
And watching myself rot right now
Is pretty tempting (it's pretty tempting)
Cuz I know life is hell
But know that I was never living (was never living)
And I know that my beginning
Leads up to my ending

Cuz I’m alone in my head
I’ve been staring at the ceiling
Laying down in my bed (laying down in my bed)
Flashed back to those sleepless nights
And all the tears that I shed (all those tears that I shed)
It’s always hard to sleep
Anxiety weighs on me like lead

I’ll try be a better person now that’s a bet (now that's a bet)
I feel like John Marston but I’m not redeemable yet (I'm not redeemable yet)
Can’t tell if I’m just tryna make a song or vent my regrets (vent my regrets)
But I know all that shit won’t matter when my Sun finally sets, aye
I’m in the highest tower (huh)
I feel like people talking shit on me
Like I’m Jack Bauer (yeah yeah)
I feel like I ain’t got no savior
In my darkest hour (no)
It be like sour sweet then gone
No wait it’s back to sour (aw)

I just be stuck up in this brain of mine
You think you know me
Every story that I tell
It’s got some sugar coating (aye)
Ball up my emotions, toss em
While I’m yelling Kobe (Kobe!)
Cuz they all want me to suffer
Like my name was Toby (yeah)

I swear I be trying hard
Just to get back on track
This ain’t Revenge of the Nerds
This Return of the Mack (yeah)
My mind’s racing
I’m soul chasing
Y’all must think I’m on crack (hey)
But you’ll just all go back to hating
If old me comes back (aye)

I don’t want that to happen (no)
My old self was full of shit and
He was capping (he was capping)
My mind’s been bent up like a twig
It’s close to snapping (close to snapping)
Never thought that I’d reveal myself through all this rapping

This ain’t an apology ya feel me
I just wanna show you how the repercussions kill me
I just wanna show you how the realest of the real be
Though I still don’t know which of these people is the real me