Song: Ella
Year: 2019
Viewed: 1 - Published at: a year ago

[Spoken]
Potential energy is a question of heart.
You have a bank in your heart where all the energy from the feelings go when they get triggered. Now what triggers a feeling, a collusion, the same as made the, you know, stars, and the thing like everything, same as made everything. Everything is the same in this universe.
It’s just a question of scale and vocabulary.
You collide with another soul,
maybe that’s a lover,
maybe that’s a cat.
And all the energy from this ity bity big bang goes into a bank around the corner from your heart, all right?
This is a metaphor.
Whatchu gonna do with that money?
There are two kinds of love capitalists, I think, or at least two kinds.
The first is your supernova spender.
Bang!
Money in the bank.
Bang!
Money right back out the bank.
Two random people fall in love, decide to bring you into this world and love you unconditionally?
Bang, money in the bank.
One brief, passionate love affair with some boy you just decided to worship?
Bang, money out the bank.
Ah, birthday parties
Slow dancing
One real electric opening night
Some point you lose track of which things are paying you and which ones you are buying
Now maybe that sounds alright to you.
Maybe to you, what’s the alternative?
Some people, some people are savers.
They take all that collusion energy that they had and they keep it in the bank.
They don’t ever run on empty, these people.
These are the people that the supernova folks seek out on rainy days ‘cause they hadn’t spent all theirs yet.
They have no desire to feel everything all at once all the time.
That shit’s exhausting.
You were related to a great many very gifted savers, especially the women.
The trouble is when a life gets stopped short,
When we lay down to die before we expect to,
And believe me girl, it’s always before you expect to,
We leave behind traces of his collusion energy that hadn’t been used up yet.
Now, maybe that’s enough to keep you company for the rest of your life,
But I don’t think it is, baby,
‘Cause you end up using your whole saving on some boy or some show or some song
And I’m not saying that’s wrong, chicken,
I just think.
Yeah, I know you mostly see kudzu,
So do I,
But kudzu or catfish, this bluff is still gonna fall in the water.
You think you gonna fix that?
Alright, let’s say you try.
Let’s say you bring a bunch of people into a room with you
And you ask them to sing with you
You ask them to pray with you
And they do that out of the goodness of their hearts.
Do you think that is going to change anything?
Look around you.
Every single person in every single room that you open your mouth to make noise in carries a sadness with them,
Like yours.
Probably deeper.
You know you can’t shut that out.
You can’t even look ‘em in the eye and tell ‘em that like, you see that in them and you’re trying to sing it out for them because it feels better than doing it for yourself and that’s your problem.
You gonna get rid of your army of the dead who mostly love you and support you and just be okay?
Alright.
What about the 85 ghosts that just showed up in here tonight on other people’s backs without their knowledge?
You gonna figure out how to deal with that in the last six minutes of this show?
And just come back tomorrow and do another one?
You’re no priest, girl.
You’re a parlor trick.

( Heather Christian )
www.ChordsAZ.com

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