[Lyric] Rituals (Hayden Casey)

I would think that I'd know better
Than to have faith in delusion
Till I listen to its promise
Feel it gilded, feel it swelling

And I can't excise the demon
Have to live alongside him
He just blinks and smiles
At the trouble he raises

And the glow won't leave me alone
I can't stop thinking, thinking, thinking about it
Not something I can summon alone

I've been looking for a way to get hurt
Looking for something to hurt me
All the love songs on the radio have lost their luster

What is holding on when you can let go
What is being tethered down when you can float
I won't ever make you bubble like that
I won't ever get you lustered like that
Everything I say just bounces right back
You're a concrete wall, I'm a rubber ball

And I just keep tossing myself at you
Hoping you'll look up at me, crack a window open
You don't see a thing, blue light in your glassy eyes

I've been looking for a way to get hurt
Looking for something to hurt me
All the love songs on the radio have lost their luster

I can't stop looking for ways to get hurt
Looking for someone to hurt me
Don't know when these lovelorn rituals will lose their luster