[Lyric] Safe Space (Third Culture Kid)

Coffee high, I talked with you till midnight
Passing through red lights with red eyes
I should've seen the signs
You put a stick to your lips and inhaled
A pretty vice with a sharp mind

Do your parents love you?
You didn’t wanna to talk about it
You avoid the hurt, sending up smoke signals to your army of words
Building up walls, you said “I know my worth”
And all I could muster was “I'm sorry.”
And if you think this is about you
It probably is, because I only write poetry for the narcissist
It was just a kiss, on cigarette lips, and I watched the nicotine fade away

You poked at my skin and made me bleed
But it wasn't enough to make me leave
I still check your Instagram feed to make sure you’re happy without me
Cause I still see you in black coffee and red cars imprintеd in empty parks and graveyards
Wistful glances but cold shouldеrs were the signs you gave me that it was over
I still see you in androgyny and earrings
And sleepovers and neck kisses
Imprinted in pet peeves
And curfews in fifteen
And your urgency to always be right
Or at least win the argument

Cause these days you don't meet my eyes
And I wonder if I hurt you as much as you hurt me
And I wonder if love was the real enemy
And I wonder if it could've worked if I'd never lied and said more to you than hi and goodbye
Would it have worked if my brain functioned like it did when I knew who I was without you?
You told me not to ask all of these questions because I was just a body
And we were just two kids creating broken silhouettes on a bed in your parents' house