[Lyric] The Greatest Show on Earth (Adolph Green, John Reardon, Kenneth Bridges, & Lady in the Dark Ensemble (1963))

[ENSEMBLE]
Ta ra ra, tszing, tszing, tszing
Ta ra ra, tszing, tszing, tszing
Ta ra ra, tszing, tszing, tszing
Ta ra ra ra!
Ta ra ra, tszing, tszing, tszing
Ta ra ra, tszing, tszing, tszing
Ta ra ra, tszing, tszing, tszing
Ta ra ra ra!

The Greatest Show on Earth!
It's full of thrills and mirth
You get your money's worth
Come one, come all!
Come see the midgets and the bushmen from Australia
Come see the cossacks in their dazzling regalia
The flower of womankind
Who can't make up her mind
Is a feature you will always recall
You get your money's worth
It's full of thrills and mirth
The Greatest Show on Earth
Come one, come all!
[RINGMASTER]
Ladies and gentlemen, I take pride in introducing
The Greatest Show on Earth
Liza Elliott's gargantuan three-ring circus
Featuring for thе first time
The captivating and tantalizing Liza Elliott
The woman who cannot makе up her mind!
In addition, we bring you an assortment
Of other scintillating stars of the Tanbark Ring
And galaxy of clowns and neuroses
In a modern miracle of melodramatic buffoonery
And mental tightrope walking
The Greatest Show on Earth!

[ENSEMBLE]
The flower of womankind
Who can't make up her mind
Is a feature you will always recall
You get your money's worth
It's full of thrills and mirth
The Greatest Show on Earth
Come one, come all!

[RINGMASTER, spoken]
Order in the courtroom!
[PAGE, spoken]
The charges against Liza Elliott. 

[RINGMASTER, spoken]
Thank you my dear. 

[LIZA, spoken]
What is all this? Charges against me? What for? What is all this?

[RINGMASTER]
Whereas

[ENSEMBLE]
Whereas

[RINGMASTER]
Liza Elliott cannot make up her mind
About the Easter cover or the circus cover
Secundus

[ENSEMBLE]
Secundus

[RINGMASTER]
Liza Elliott cannot make up her mind
Whether she is marrying Kendall Nesbitt or not
Moreover
[ENSEMBLE]
Moreover

[RINGMASTER]
Liza Elliott cannot make up her mind
As to the kind of woman she wants to be
The executive or the enchantress
And in as much as

[ENSEMBLE]
In as much as

[RINGMASTER]
In a world where tumult and turmoil reign
These indecisions of Liza Elliott only add to the confusions
Of an already, as indicated, confused world
Therefore be it resolved

[ENSEMBLE]
Be it resolved

[RINGMASTER]
That Liza Elliott be brought to trial
And be made to make up her mind

[ENSEMBLE]
Hooray!

[RINGMASTER, spoken]
Introducing that death-defying trapeze artist and prosecuting attorney, Charley Johnson!

[CHARLEY]
I'm the attorney for prosecution
Can't be bought or sold
For the jam she's in there's no solution
Once the story is told!

[RINGMASTER, spoken]
Introducing that thrilling bareback rider and attorney for the defense, Randy Curtis!

[RANDY]
I'm the lawyer for the defendant
Can't be sold or bought
Miss Elliott's star is in the ascendant
This will come to naught!

[RINGMASTER, spoken]
Introducing those merry madcaps and prankish, ha ha ha, pantaloonatics, the jury!

[JURY]
Our object all sublime
We shall achieve in time
To let the melody fit the rhyme
The melody fit the rhyme

[RINGMASTER, spoken]
This is all immaterial and irrelevant
What do you think this is - Gilbert and Sellivant?

[CHARLEY, spoken]
Your Honor, Mr. Ringmaster! I would like to introduce that peerless witness and lion tamer, Kendall Nesbitt. 

Mr. Nesbitt, you are divorcing your wife so you can be free to marry the defendant, isn't that so?

[NESBITT, spoken]
Yes sir

[CHARLEY, spoken]
You were led to believe the defendant would marry you when, as, and if

[NESBITT, spoken]
Yes sir

[CHARLEY, spoken]
But now she refuses to make up her mind

[NESBITT, spoken]
Yes sir!

[CHARLEY, spoken]
You gave her the best years of your life and yet she refuses to be your wife!

[NESBITT, spoken]
Yes sir!