[Intro]
There's an intruder in my house
He cut my phone line: can't dial out (Shit!)
I scream for police, but I doubt
They're gonna hear me when I shout
[Verse 1]
A couple of cocktails'll send me to jail
There's a couple of cops hot on my trail, but this time
When I get pulled over there's a Doberman Pinscher
And a pit bull in the seat, these pigs'll get bit
Foolin' with me, quit foolin' with me
Bitch, you're gonna see no pistol in the seat
Why it always gotta be an issue when you're me?
And which you're gonna see in the long run, I'ma be the wrong one
You wanna harass with this limo-tinted glass
Flashin' that flashlight on my ass — where was you at
Last night when them assholes ran up on my grass?
Rapper slash actor, kiss the crack of my cracker slash ass
They took away my right to bear arms
What I'm 'posed to fight with, bare palms?
Yeah, right! They comin' with bombs
I'm comin' with flare guns; we as Americans
[Chorus]
We as Americans, us as a citizen
Gotta protect ourselves, look at how shit has been
We better check ourselves, livin' up in these streets
Through worse and through better health, survivin' by any means
We as Americans, us as a citizen
We are Samaritans, what do we get us in?
We better check ourselves, look at how shit has been
Take a look where you live, this is America, and we are Americans
[Verse 2]
I make beaucoup bucks, wearin' beaucoup vests
Drama hangin' over my head like a voodoo hex
I coulda been next to fly over the cuckoo's nest
With you-know-who, with an S tattooed to my chest
But I've finessed it, now I've got the industry pissy
Ever since me and Dre split it fifty-fifty on 50
It's funny, we got a buzz spreadin' quicker
Than makin' paper airplanes out of a twenty
Fuck money! I don't rap for dead presidents
I'd rather see the President [dead]
It's never been said, but I set precedents
And the standards and they can't stand it
My name shoulda been "Bastard," the shit shoulda been plastered
On my forehead with a stamp, I shoulda been blasted
I shoulda been had a cap put in my ass
But I'm too swift and fast for that, I'm past it
I'm too old to go and cruise Gratiot — fuck that shit!
I done seen how fast this rap shit
Can turn into some pap-pap shit, that quick, snap click
But this time, they got the fuckin' automatic
Ain't no one gon' test this man — clack (click)
[Chorus]
We as Americans, us as a citizen
Gotta protect ourselves, look at how shit has been
We better check ourselves, livin' up in these streets
Through worse and through better health, survivin' by any means
We as Americans, us as a citizen
We are Samaritans, what do we get us in?
We better check ourselves, look at how shit has been
Take a look where you live, this is America, and we are Americans
[Verse 3]
(Shht!) I got a secret if you can keep it between us
I tuck two ninas under my jeans, either side of my penis
Under my long johns, under my Sean Johns
One run-in with the long arm of the law, I'm long gone
I'ma do five years — no less than that, no questions asked
So it might be a good idea that I stop right here
And quit while I'm ahead, already in the red
Already got a steady infrared meant for my head
A target on my back, bigger problems than that
Bin Laden on my ass, he probably gon' send a task
I ain't gon' even ask, they ain't gon' let me pack
They ain't gon' give me my semi, but I got my weed back
[Chorus]
We as Americans, us as a citizen
Gotta protect ourselves, look at how shit has been
We better check ourselves, livin' up in these streets
Through worse and through better health, survivin' by any means
We as Americans, us as a citizen
We are Samaritans, what do we get us in?
We better check ourselves, look at how shit has been
Take a look where you live, this is America, and we are Americans
There's an intruder in my house
He cut my phone line: can't dial out (Shit!)
I scream for police, but I doubt
They're gonna hear me when I shout
[Verse 1]
A couple of cocktails'll send me to jail
There's a couple of cops hot on my trail, but this time
When I get pulled over there's a Doberman Pinscher
And a pit bull in the seat, these pigs'll get bit
Foolin' with me, quit foolin' with me
Bitch, you're gonna see no pistol in the seat
Why it always gotta be an issue when you're me?
And which you're gonna see in the long run, I'ma be the wrong one
You wanna harass with this limo-tinted glass
Flashin' that flashlight on my ass — where was you at
Last night when them assholes ran up on my grass?
Rapper slash actor, kiss the crack of my cracker slash ass
They took away my right to bear arms
What I'm 'posed to fight with, bare palms?
Yeah, right! They comin' with bombs
I'm comin' with flare guns; we as Americans
[Chorus]
We as Americans, us as a citizen
Gotta protect ourselves, look at how shit has been
We better check ourselves, livin' up in these streets
Through worse and through better health, survivin' by any means
We as Americans, us as a citizen
We are Samaritans, what do we get us in?
We better check ourselves, look at how shit has been
Take a look where you live, this is America, and we are Americans
[Verse 2]
I make beaucoup bucks, wearin' beaucoup vests
Drama hangin' over my head like a voodoo hex
I coulda been next to fly over the cuckoo's nest
With you-know-who, with an S tattooed to my chest
But I've finessed it, now I've got the industry pissy
Ever since me and Dre split it fifty-fifty on 50
It's funny, we got a buzz spreadin' quicker
Than makin' paper airplanes out of a twenty
Fuck money! I don't rap for dead presidents
I'd rather see the President [dead]
It's never been said, but I set precedents
And the standards and they can't stand it
My name shoulda been "Bastard," the shit shoulda been plastered
On my forehead with a stamp, I shoulda been blasted
I shoulda been had a cap put in my ass
But I'm too swift and fast for that, I'm past it
I'm too old to go and cruise Gratiot — fuck that shit!
I done seen how fast this rap shit
Can turn into some pap-pap shit, that quick, snap click
But this time, they got the fuckin' automatic
Ain't no one gon' test this man — clack (click)
[Chorus]
We as Americans, us as a citizen
Gotta protect ourselves, look at how shit has been
We better check ourselves, livin' up in these streets
Through worse and through better health, survivin' by any means
We as Americans, us as a citizen
We are Samaritans, what do we get us in?
We better check ourselves, look at how shit has been
Take a look where you live, this is America, and we are Americans
[Verse 3]
(Shht!) I got a secret if you can keep it between us
I tuck two ninas under my jeans, either side of my penis
Under my long johns, under my Sean Johns
One run-in with the long arm of the law, I'm long gone
I'ma do five years — no less than that, no questions asked
So it might be a good idea that I stop right here
And quit while I'm ahead, already in the red
Already got a steady infrared meant for my head
A target on my back, bigger problems than that
Bin Laden on my ass, he probably gon' send a task
I ain't gon' even ask, they ain't gon' let me pack
They ain't gon' give me my semi, but I got my weed back
[Chorus]
We as Americans, us as a citizen
Gotta protect ourselves, look at how shit has been
We better check ourselves, livin' up in these streets
Through worse and through better health, survivin' by any means
We as Americans, us as a citizen
We are Samaritans, what do we get us in?
We better check ourselves, look at how shit has been
Take a look where you live, this is America, and we are Americans
( Eminem )
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