[Lyric] Ben In The Pen (Stompin' Tom Connors)

[Chorus]
They call me Ben, there in the pen
They take the guff, and they suffer
But I'll be free, when I'm fifty-three
And I bet I'll be a lot tougher
I bet I'll be a lot tougher

[Verse 1]
As a lad, I was really bad
It wasn't smart to be good
I beat up my dog, and I choked my frog
And I acted just as mean as I could
I hit all the girls, and put gum in their curls
'Cause I liked to hear 'em cry and bleat
I'd punch the little boys, and steal all their toys
'Cause I knew they weren't smarter than me

[Chorus]
They call me Ben, there in the pen
They take the guff, and they suffer
But I'll be free, when I'm fifty-three
And I bet I'll be a lot tougher
I bet I'll be a lot tougher
[Verse 2]
When I was sixteen, I was really mean
I could scrap at the toss of a coin
I was leader of a gang: Rough Orangutans
And you had to be a good thief to join
Yeah, we had the black jackets and the motor bikes
And we forced all the girl to... skip school...
And the cops, they'd all try to sympathize
We told them how our parents were so cruel

[Chorus]
They call me Ben, there in the pen
They take the guff, and they suffer
But I'll be free, when I'm fifty-three
And I bet I'll be a lot tougher
I bet I'll be a lot tougher

[Verse 3]
When I turned twenty-one, I had to have a gun
'Cause I planned me a robbery one day
And the girlfriend said, that she'd rather be dead
Than to hang around with a guy like me
Well, I granted her a wish, and dumped her in wish the fish
And then I went to meet Frank
Yeah, that's the same day I shot, and killed me a cop
He didn't wanna let me into the bank
[Chorus]
They call me Ben, there in the pen
They take the guff, and they suffer
But I'll be free, when I'm fifty-three
And I bet I'll be a lot tougher
I hope I'll be a lot tougher

(Ehh, what's the use? I ain't a very good bluffer)
(I backed it outta hammerman, back to the hammer)