[Lyric] Boris Come Tae Scotland (Mitch Benn)

Brexit's brought disaster and broken Scotland's heart
Rarely have our nations felt so very far apart
So the PM has decided to head north of the wall
I'm sure this visit willnae be calamitous at all

Boris come tae Scotland , deploy your easy charm
We can almost certainly guarantee you willnae come tae harm
Boris come tae Scotland , and travel without fear
You're just the kind of Englishman we've always loved up here

So haste ye up tae Scotland , we have no doubt you will
Smooth over our objections with your diplomatic skill
Your visit's sure to bring the resolution that we seek
We'll have our independence by about this time next week

Boris come tae Scotland , you're sure to win the day
It's no as if your best laid plans ever gang agley
Boris come tae Scotland , you'll love it I believe
We'll make you feel so welcome we may never let you leave

Boris come tae Scotland , we hope your stay is long
Say hello to all the locals , what could possibly go wrong?
Boris come tae Scotland , don't be scared of what we'll do
Does the name William Wallace mean anything to you?
(Have ye no seen that film?
Ach , it disnae end well)