[Lyric] Fast Monkey (SteveSongs)

[Skit]
Silly: Hey everybody. It's me, Silly Vanilly. How ya doin'? Uhh, they asked me to introduce this next song, which is "Fast Monkey". I haven't quite heard the song myself yet, but uhh, I'm sure it's gonna be great. So without any further ado, whatever that is, I'm gonna introduce Steve and the Simian Singers performing "Fast Monkey"! (pause) "Fast Monkey" (pause) OK? Ready? "Fast Monkey" (pause) Ready? Go

[Verse 1]
I'm fast
I'm very very fast
I'm faster than a fast monkey

[Verse 2, slow voice, tempo slows]
I'm slow
I'm very very slow
I'm slower (yeah, I am) than a slow monkey

[Chorus]
(Fast voice) Fast, (slow voice) slow
(Fast voice) Fast fast (slow voice) slow
(Fast voice) Are you fast (slow voice) or are you slow?
(Fast voice) Fast, (slow voice) slow
(Fast voice) Fast fast (slow voice) slow
(Fast voice) Are you fast (slow voice) or are you slow?
(Silly) Is, is this a folk song or something?

[Verse 3, deep voice]
I'm big (Silly: Whoa!) (He's big) (Silly: Nice! Backup singers!)
I'm very very big (He's big)
I'm bigger (bigger) than a big monkey
(Silly) No kidding, you almost stepped on me over here

[Verse 4, high voice]
I'm small (Silly: Ah!)
I'm very very small
I'm smaller (Silly: Let me guess) than a small monkey
(Silly) This is unbelievable!

[Chorus]
(Deep voice) Big, (high voice) small
(Deep voice) Big big (high voice) small
(Deep voice) Are you big (high voice) or are you small?
(Deep voice) Big, (high voice) small
(Deep voice) Big big (high voice) small
(Deep voice) Are you big (high voice) or are you small?
(Silly) This is the most ridiculous song I've ever heard!

[Verse 5, excited voice]
I'm happy!
I'm very very happy!
I'm happier than a happy monkey!
(Silly) Uh-oh
[Verse 6, sad voice]
I'm sad (Silly: I knew it)
I'm very very sad
I'm sadder than a sad monkey (:sobs:)

[Chorus]
(Excited voice) Happy, (sad voice) sad
(Excited voice) Happy happy (sad voice) sad
(Excited voice) Are ya happy?! (Sad voice) Or are you sad?
(Excited voice) It's all right, buddy!
(Sad voice) I wanna go home
(Silly) I know what you're talkin' about. I wanna go home too

[Verse 7, quiet voices]
We're loud (Silly: Ow, wha??)
We're very very loud
We're louder than loud monkeys
(Silly) This is gettin' spooky

[Verse 8, loud voice]
I'M QUIET! (Silly: Yikes!)
I'M VERY VERY QUIET!
QUIETER!!!
(Silly) Wait a second, hold on a minute
TH--
(Silly) Hold it, please. Hold it now
WHAT??
(Silly) Were you going to say "Quieter than a quiet monkey"?
YES I WAS
(Silly) OK, first of all, you're not quiet
OH, THANK YOU
(Silly) And second of all, what are you guys talkin' about???
(Overlapping voices) What ARE we talking about?
(Silly) "Faster than a fast monkey"? "Slower than a slow monkey"? The comparisons are ineffectual (That's true). I mean, where do you get this stuff? I think you've fallen off the silly boat into a vat of ridiculousness
(Overlapping voices)
(Silly) Uh-uh, uh-uh. This. Is. Silly. (It sure is.) Nilly willy lilly. Nilly willy lilly. Willy
(Steve) I know it is, but Silly, what do you want us to do about it?
(Silly) Oh, nothin', I'm just sayin'. Mind if I sing along?
(Steve) Sure, that'd be great!
[Chorus]
(Fast voice) Fast, (slow voice) slow
(Fast voice) Fast fast (slow voice) slow
(Deep voice) Are you big (high voice) or are you small?
(Excited voice) Happy, (sad voice) sad
(Quiet voices) Quiet quiet (loud voice) LOUD
(Silly) Are you silly or are you not ... silly. Unsilly? Not silly. No, that was right. That was good. That was a wrap, right? Is that good for you guys? (pause) H-hello?