[Lyric] Say Something (RAYE)

[Verse 1]
Cards games and heart games
I said let's play, I should know better
My boy ain't my boy
But I call him that 'cause it feels better
Court case last Monday
But he [?] so I feel better
Painkillers and codine
I got stomach cramps under my sweater
Dark words from his dark mind
And there's dark stains under my eyes
I'm scared when I look at him
And I don't know why I'm surprised
Silk sheets and I'm crying
And I'm staying here when I should go
I'm scared if I leave now I'll never come back
[?]