[Lyric] Dear World I Am Not Okay (John Calvry)

Lately, I've been hearing voices in my head
Close my eyes, vivid images I can't forget
I got to pop a Xanax just to go to bed
And some days when I wake I wish I were dead
Drowning in depression drowning in the pain
Sink in negativity, I sink into the darkness and despair
I’m falling deep into my ocean, feeling numb and unaware
Trying to reach the surface just to grasp a bit of air
The bitterness of pills lingers on my tongue
I either blackout or stay up long enough to see the sun
PTSD, OCD, Anxiety
Are demons that I'm fighting, I ain't got the remedy nah
I lost control I don’t know what I’m doing
I fell in a hole and I know that I’m losing
They told me to pray but they’re overdoing
I know that there’s more my mind is in ruin
I’m yelling for help and they think that I’m crazy
I'm reaching for help but my vision was hazy
I reached for the pills cuz they wanted to save me
The antidepressants are keeping me lazy
Anxiety is hitting heart is pounding
I start sweating hands are shaking
Head is spinning I’m not breathing
Bodies freezing chest is killing
Hands keep shaking stomachs sinking
Visions fading I’m not breathing
I’m not breathing I can’t breathe in
I can’t (Gasp)
This life that I'm living I ain't living well
I feel like I died and woke up in hell
Dear world I am not ok
Dear world I am not ok
This life that I'm living I ain't living well
I feel like I died and woke up in hell
Dear world I am not ok
Dear world I am not ok

Ever hate your life that you don’t want it no more?
No? Well, I guess I’m alone
In this, I’m not part of the norm
But I’m used to it, never really found my place
And I always been a loner, so give me my space
And I'm sorry for the honesty, don’t need your grace
Cuz I heard em call me weak and that I ain’t got faith
But this is more than just a prayer, cuz my mind ain’t safe
And they’re telling me that I need to talk to God more
Tell me can you see I ain’t really got the words so
Bout to spill the tea God I’ve feeling kinda ignored
I’ve given all of me and you kick me to the curb so
I don’t know what else to do to get your attention
Yea you told me last year you had better intentions
But this hell that I’m going through, you never did mention
All I see you do is pick up the tension
Had to turn my phone off, I got messages I haven't read
From months ago, it's sitting in a drawer that’s next to my bed
I had to block out the world before I did something I regret
And pour my heart into this song to let you know you not alone
I had to come to terms that I'm not ok
I’m not ok
I had to come to terms that I’m not ok
I’m not ok
I had to come to terms that I'm not ok
Yea, I’m not ok
I had to come to terms that I’m not ok
I had to come to terms that I’m not ok

This life that I’m living I ain’t living well
I feel like I died and woke up in hell
Dear world I am not ok
Dear world I am not ok
This life that I’m living I ain’t living well
I feel like I died and woke up in hell
Dear world I am not ok
Dear world I am not ok