[Lyric] Sweet Charity: If My Friends Could See Me Now (Gwen Verdon)

[CHARITY]
If they could see me now
That little gang of mine
I'm eating fancy chow
And drinking fancy wine
I'd like those stumble bums to see for a fact
The kind of top drawer first rate chums I attract!
All I can say is wow
Eee, look at where I am
Tonight I landed pow
Right in a pot of jam
What a set up, holy cow
They'd never believe it
If my friends could see me now!

If they could see me now
My little dusty group
Traipsing 'round this
Million dollar chicken coop
I'd hear those thrift shop cats say: "Brother get her!"
Draped on a bedspread made from three kinds of fur!
All I can say is "Wow!"
Wait 'till the riff and raff
See just exactly how
He signed this autograph
What a build-up, holy cow
They'd nеver believе it
If my friends could see me now!
If they could see me now
Alone with Mr. V
Who's waiting on me
Like he was a maître d'
I hear my buddies saying: Crazy! What gives?
Tonight she's living like the other half lives!
To think the highest-brow
Which I must say is he
Should pick the lowest-brow
Which there's no doubt is me
What a step up, holy cow
They'd never believe it
If my friends could see me now!

They'd never believe it
They'd never believe it
If my friends could see me now

(spoken)
Hi girls, it's me, Charity!