Yeah, mind’s a warzone
Sometimes I can only play defense with merlot
Sometimes I need weed and my shit don’t burn slow
When I come down, there it is, the hurt though
I cannot stand my default mode, all grown
29 years, what the fuck’s it all for?
I need an earthbound thing to fall towards
Spent a few hundred on clothes, I’m all for it
Don’t like my lyrics, you can stigmatize me
I don’t like me either, know it ain’t surprising
Sit by my heater and I keep on typing
Boss says I’m good, man I hope she likes me
Go on fighting, melatonin nightly
Sad as fuck with good flow, new-age hyphy
Lie to myself that the answer’s wifey
But I’ve been through this shit and there ain’t no light, see
I do not, I do not need
Another self-help book to read
Aunt Kathy still wants me Catholic
I cannot, I cannot have it
I cannot function, it’s tragic
Another trip to the Mayo Clinic
Saying shit, yeah they think I’m kidding
Drunk again, yeah I know I did it
Smile like I’m not in pain
Do life like I’m not insane
Like I’m not deranged
Like I’ve got something in my aim
But it’s all just synthetic like aspartame
And I’m with a beautiful girl like I’m not empty
Like I’ve got more to give, that life is tempting
Pray to God, “Let me please think more simply”
Another voice comes in and says, “You’re filthy”
When I get charged, yeah I know I’m guilty
Friends tell me I should try to be more healthy
I don’t even know what the fuck that is
Spent 40 minutes on the treadmill, is this it?
Is this it? Is this all there is?
Just invest in a house, have some kids
Get rest, kiss the spouse, what’s the risk?
But do I really need to bring them all into this?
Tell me that you fucking love me
Saying it like you mean it
I don’t know what’s above me
My end goal used to be to be comfy
Now my inner-self is always saying to run free
I don’t even know where to run anymore
Take a handful of pills, I just lay on the floor
And I never want to move, man there’s got to be more
Slowly cry while I enter the bookstore, I’m sore
Pray to a God that I’ve never met
Tell Him that I ain’t got nothing left
Give me an F if it’s all a test
Story’s all a mess, I don’t need the rest
Story’s all a mess, I don’t need the rest
Give me an F if it’s all a test, yeah
Sometimes I can only play defense with merlot
Sometimes I need weed and my shit don’t burn slow
When I come down, there it is, the hurt though
I cannot stand my default mode, all grown
29 years, what the fuck’s it all for?
I need an earthbound thing to fall towards
Spent a few hundred on clothes, I’m all for it
Don’t like my lyrics, you can stigmatize me
I don’t like me either, know it ain’t surprising
Sit by my heater and I keep on typing
Boss says I’m good, man I hope she likes me
Go on fighting, melatonin nightly
Sad as fuck with good flow, new-age hyphy
Lie to myself that the answer’s wifey
But I’ve been through this shit and there ain’t no light, see
I do not, I do not need
Another self-help book to read
Aunt Kathy still wants me Catholic
I cannot, I cannot have it
I cannot function, it’s tragic
Another trip to the Mayo Clinic
Saying shit, yeah they think I’m kidding
Drunk again, yeah I know I did it
Smile like I’m not in pain
Do life like I’m not insane
Like I’m not deranged
Like I’ve got something in my aim
But it’s all just synthetic like aspartame
And I’m with a beautiful girl like I’m not empty
Like I’ve got more to give, that life is tempting
Pray to God, “Let me please think more simply”
Another voice comes in and says, “You’re filthy”
When I get charged, yeah I know I’m guilty
Friends tell me I should try to be more healthy
I don’t even know what the fuck that is
Spent 40 minutes on the treadmill, is this it?
Is this it? Is this all there is?
Just invest in a house, have some kids
Get rest, kiss the spouse, what’s the risk?
But do I really need to bring them all into this?
Tell me that you fucking love me
Saying it like you mean it
I don’t know what’s above me
My end goal used to be to be comfy
Now my inner-self is always saying to run free
I don’t even know where to run anymore
Take a handful of pills, I just lay on the floor
And I never want to move, man there’s got to be more
Slowly cry while I enter the bookstore, I’m sore
Pray to a God that I’ve never met
Tell Him that I ain’t got nothing left
Give me an F if it’s all a test
Story’s all a mess, I don’t need the rest
Story’s all a mess, I don’t need the rest
Give me an F if it’s all a test, yeah
( 4JM4 )
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